So....all the 4US money is out of the house. I have survived 4US, one birthday, one anniversary, and a Pampered Chef party. One birthday to go and my insane life will settle back to just crazy. I am looking forward to it.

Pampere Chef was good. I sure enjoy cooking, so seeing all the cool gadgets really was fun. The turnout was disappointing, but I just don't have a lot of friends anyway, and it wasn't the best time. But I had to sneak it in to make it before September was over and I would lose 20% off of stoneware....which was my whole purpose for the party. I am anxious to have some free money to spend and then have some cheap items coming my way as well. Especially the bread pans! Can't wait! It's like Christmas in ...whenever they come!

Tonight was the third AWANA night. We are kind of used to the routine now. I think. There seems to be something I do wrong almost every week. I think eventually I will catch on completely. I am really enjoying not being in charge. It is much more restful and I am really getting to know my kids. I love that! They are all sweet kids who really follow directions well. I am anxious to pray for them more and just get to know them better! I am also really enjoying the special time that I have with Rayana. She is a special girl who has some special needs. She gets less time with me than the other two, and I really miss her. And I can tell that that has an affect on her. I hope that the time at AWANA will be special for her. It is the first time that I have actually been just a leader. I have only been a junior helper or a Director. AWANA is such a great program and I am really proud of them when they say their verses! Nothing touches my heart like hearing them say their verses!

Randy is interested in starting to go to a Bible study with some old friends that meets on Thursday nights. I am very excited! I would love to start that! It would be so good for our whole family! I am praying that Rayana's soccer practice might get changed so that we can begin that immediately. It would be terrific for Randy, for our relationship, for his relationship with the kids, and just for the kids in general. The kids are very involved with the Bible study, which sounds perfect to me. I have avoided small groups before because they always want to find babysitting for the kids. I am not anxious to spend time away from them! And Bible study seems like the most appropriate place in the world for them!

Well...off to bed. Big birthday tomorrow!

4US and Priorities

Well, we are in the aftermath. This weekend was 4US, year 5. It is amazing. And exhausting, and demanding, and not over. My work really just started. And my house looks like it. Right now I am struggling with my priorities. How can I make 4US a priority and still keep my family as #1. Or should my family take a back seat for a little while? It is hard to know. And I hope that God will bless me as I seek the answer to this.

I took a few days pretty much away from the family to work exclusively on 4US. Actually, Kara, Nathan and the kids were there the whole time, I was just very busy. Is it wrong to put aside my motherly/wifely duties to work for 4US? I don't think it is. I think that the benefits to my family far outweigh the negatives, for a time. What really concerns me is the amount of time that it takes for weeks before, after, and during the event. How can I keep a schedule and still do what needs to be done 4US? How do I go about picking up the aftermath of an event like that and the pieces of my family. I feel 20 steps behind, and getting farther behind ever so quickly. I know the end will come, life will get back on schedule, but I am feeling the strain of the chaos. I crave a schedule, without interuptions, one that I can cling to and know there is time for everything. Right now everything is in chaos - the kids schooling, the house, 4US, my responsibilities. How do I know where to pour what little time I feel like I have? I pray that God will give me the answer.

Birthdays

Saturday was Rayana's 8th birthday. It was a wonderful day...filled with simplicity and fun. She told me over and over that it was the best birthday ever. That makes my day. Life is so full at the moment, it was hard to take time to really celebrate with her, so I was very relieved that she felt special! We started with chocolate chip pancakes....her favorite food EVER...then went to Josiah's first soccer game, followed by Rayana's with cookies and drinks for her team. They all sang to her and she loved it. Then it was home to change out of soccer clothes and out to Moctezuma's with Masako. She loved every minute of that, but especially the big sombrero and the loud singing by the waiters. Then we came home and cut off her hair. She had a good foot cut off and donated and now is sporting a very adorable, and much easier to care for, hairdo! We both love it, but Randy really misses her long hair I think. Then off to church, which was just what she wanted to do for her birthday. Then we finished with Blizzards at Dairy Queen with Uncle Bill, Nathan, and Masako. It really was a great birthday. Finally, she snuggled into a new bedding with new hot pink sheets, a new pillow and a new comforter. I can see why she enjoyed the day.

Our schedule is not easing up at all, but we are starting to fall into sync a little. Josiah and I are getting the hang of his school work, and Noelle is getting the hang of hers. Rayana is enjoying public school for now. But wants to reevaluate around Christmas. I think that is a great option. I sure would love to have them all at home, but I am also aware of how much work that might make for me. But on the other hand, there would be a lot of extra time as well. Time spent making lunches (more than once a day), time in the car, waiting in parking lots, at recess, in between classes, that we could squish all together and just get it done. It sure is tempting.

And I'm still working on my schedule. Months ago, I ordered a book from www.titus2.com. It is called Manager of their Chores. I loved it and have implimented their chore system in our own home, though I am not as disciplined with it as I really should be. I am finding that the big reason the kids chores don't get done is not their unwillingness as much as it is our lack of a good schedule. Well thankfully, the wonderful family at www.titus2.com also wrote a book on scheduling called Manager of their Homes. So I ordered it as well. They were both a little expensive, but I strongly believe that they represent a bood biblical model of what God wants for our home, and they have encouraged me to tackle character training in our children, which is something that had basically been overlooked. So I am almost finished reading the book now and am working on listing everything that I need to get done in a day so that I can see if it will fit. It is very interesting to think of very moment of my day scheduled like that, but I can really see how unproductive I am and how a schedule could really allow me to devote my time to my priorities.....my family. I am anxious to see where this will lead.

Love the way God works!!!

So I have been praying for a long time for God to give me discipine. I am not naturally very disciplined...unless I absolutely have to be...then I get it done. But if there is not stress...it might not happen. Well, in preparation for our new crazy school year, I decided to read the Maxwell's book on scheduling. I have had a very hard time getting very far into it though, as life is busy, but have scheduled time to read it a little at a time. (Like that?? I'm getting better just by owning the book!)

Well today was crazy, but Josiah and I managed one hour to sit down and work on his school. We did a lesson from his Intro to Online Learning class. Can you guess what the subject was?? Of course...organization and scheduling! Then I ended up needing to take Rayana to soccer practice and wait with her...which gave me 45 minutes with nothing to do but sit and read my book! I only have a few chapters left and have serious prayed about a new, organized and disciplined schedule for myself and the kids. We have a lot to do, and it just isn't going to work if we don't discipline ourselves and use our time wisely. I am excited to being the actual process...but am determined to wait until I finish the book. I want to have all the necessary info together.

On the other hand...today was the first day of school for the kids! Rayana is in the second grade, and really loved her teacher. Her birthday is this weekend, and we are excited to be bringing cookies to school....quick way to make friends! Josiah had the opportunity to spend the whole day at Idlewild, just to see how things work, get to know the teachers and hang out. So we didn't get a lot of is schoolwork done, but think it was very good for him! And we have his schedule figured out...at least for now. He will go to Idlewild at 11 on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. He will be there for recess, lunch and then either Art or PE. Then I will pick him up at 1. 6 hours a week will really help him to stay in touch with his friends, and hopefully leave him with enough time to do his work at home. I am ecstatic about how this has all worked out! Now if he could just get some more challenging work...but one step at a time!

Noelle loved her first day of homeschooling. She called me "Teacher" all day, and wanted me to call her "Student". She really enjoyed the activities and I believe it will be very beneficial for her as well as allow me to focus on Josiah a little more, while she is occupied with her work.

All in all...I am very excited, both for our new schedule and for the choices we have made for our children this year. At least for now, we are giving them the best we can.

What a ride!

These last few days have been absolutely crazy! It started Friday, with my husband's 20 year high school reunion. I was up far later than my normal bedtime! Then Saturday night....same thing, but even later. Then last night....started to go to bed at 8...and couldn't sleep! Ended up staying up intil 1am....AGAIN! It is going to be a rough couple of days adjusting my body back to a normal schedule.

The reunion was terrific. I had a great time meeting many of my husbands friends, and putting faces to the names I have heard so many times. It was also great to see my husband really enjoying himself. He had a blast.

We also had an old friend of his here from Iowa for a couple of days. It was great to get to know an old friend, to find out more about his life and to see pictures of his family. I felt very bad for him though. This had to be an extremely rough weekend....he got almost NO sleep! He is definitely going to need a vacation from THIS vacation!

So, this week starts school, for all three kids. It is going to be a very rough year...schedule wise. I am praying for wisdom and discipline.

Too MUCH!!!

How can I possibly make up for years of ignoring my house in two weeks?? I don't know. But I'm giving it my best shot.

Tomorrow starts my new year...of sorts. This weekend is my husband's twentieth high school reunion. We are planning to attend events on both Friday and Saturday evening. We are also having an old friend come and stay with us for the reunion weekend. And then school starts next week. Which is always a beginning of the year for me.

That said. I decided to take a look around my house and try to view it the way a guest would. It was enlightening. There was stuff EVERYWHERE! Old broken, abused and unused stuff! So last weekend we had a big yard sale. Boy was that a lot of work! 5am mornings trying to get the signs out and stuff put up. Late nights trying to save everything from a downpour and then clean up. Then tending to a house, that though missing lost of stuff....looked like a bomb had exploded.

So, in the last two weeks, I have....scraped popcorn off the beams, primed and painted them, painted most of my dining room and kitchen, moved bought a bookshelf, cleaned a gallon of primer out of the carpet and kitchen floor, bought new dining room chairs, got rid of our supersized junk collecter by the door, cleaned all toys out of our living space, shampooed the carpets, cleaned out the refrigerator, rearranged some furniture, caught up on laundry (and got rid of a LOT of socks), taken a very expensive but productive trip to IKEA with a sick child, down a lot of work on 4us, repainted most of the bathroom, cleaned the porch, rearranged the garden, multiple trips to the goodwill, trip to the dump and recycle center, multiple store trips, and much more that I can't think of right now. I think that makes me Superwoman!

I am vowing though, in light of this....to own much less. We need less than half of what we have. We want to live more organized, calm lives, and we can't with so much stuff. We can't clean well, we can't be hospitable, because we have too much. So....we did a big overhaul, and will again before Christmas. But we are at least a few steps in the right direction.

Now, back to work, less than 24 hours left!

A year and half ago, one of my new years resolutions was to be more green. It has had a pretty big impact on us and the way that we do things. Some are obvious ways....we recycle more, we use more organic or natural products. But many ways I might not have expected. I think rather than becoming more green...we have become more simple. By simple, I mean living the way people might have decades ago. We make most if not all of our own cleaners. We use rags instead of paper towels, cloth napkins instead of paper. We compost. We make our own laundry soap. We have pretty much eliminated prepackaged food from our home. We make own bread, grind our own wheat, make bagels, tortillas, pitas, english muffins, etc. None have been perfected, but we are working on that. We hang dry much of our laundry. We try to buy efficiently, when we have to purchase. We have a garden now. We are much better about storing our food, and using it before it spoils.

All of this to say....simple is not really simpler. It is just different...basic. And very enjoyable. I appreciate our food much more when I see the work that it took to create, whether that be from my garden, or homemade bread. It make me feel better to use laundry soap that I made. There are so many lost arts, so much independency that I hope to recover.

We are working hard (at least I am), on getting rid of half of what we own. Half is not actually very realistic, but it does put me in the right mind frame. We own too much. It clutters our life. It stresses. It breaks, gets stained, ruined, lost. I want to own far less, and then be a better steward with what I do own. Our garage sale is in two weeks. We have lots to get rid of. And a lot more to go through before that time. My hope is that when it is finished. Everything will have a place. Every thing will have a home. And we will know where that home is!! Our goal is to earn enough to purchase the Little House on the Prairie DVD set. We are enjoying watching those immensely. I am sure we will make this goal, but it sure helps the kids to have a goal, and to see what they will be getting for all their giving up.

In short...my family philosophy...own less, appreciate and care for what you do own. And be grateful for everything. "What do you have that was not given to you? And if it was given to you, why to act as though it was not?" It's our verse for the week, and such a good reminder that all we have is actually God's, and needs to be cared for and used for His purposes.

Now to tackle the next drawer!

New School Books

Today Josiah's books for school came. I have been very excited about this, but Josiah did not seem to care...until the books showed up today. Then we were both excited. He opened box after box smiling with delight at all the books he would be learning from. He was especially thrilled with a math workbook that is at least 3 inches thick. It was exciting to see him getting anxious for school to start.

There was also big thick books for me! Didn't quite realize I would be getting so much work too, but I am delighted as well. I know there will be questions that Josiah has, and I am very anxious to help him discover the answers. I love that I will be learning all of this with him. We can talk about everything that he is learning at school, and I will be completely informed about what is going on.

Josiah pointed out something that I had not considered about online schooling. He and I both love to know what is ahead. I love the syllabus for classes. It let me know what to expect, what I would be learning, and what I needed. But in elementary school, you don't get that. You never know what you will be learning next. You don't know what books you will be reading...what you will study...what you may be doing. This is not always true, but often it is the case. So for Josiah to sit down with all the books he would be using to complete his 5th grade year...or at least the books a normal 5th grader would need was pretty exciting. He can figure out what he will be doing, just by looking at his supplies.

Well, we looked at them all, got them all put up on the shelf, his on the left, mine on the right with his science kit in the middle. We are ready...and excited.

PS. Josiah is already halfway through the math textbook...it's been 2 hours.

Busy...busy...desperately busy

It has been too long since I blogged. Especially being that it was a New Year's resolution, but oh, well. Lots has happened. Most specifically was Josiah's bacterial meningitis. But that is for another day.

This summer has been a lot of fun. I thoroughly enjoy spending time with my kids. I love summer vacation, and hate when school starts again. Lucky for me...this year Josiah will be doing an online academy, so I will be his learning coach/fellow student for a majority of the school day. He will attend Idlewild for a little also, so he maintains friendships and peer contact. But I am soooooo happy to have him home more! I hate when they leave for school.

Next week I will have my hands very full. Both my brother and sister will be going to work for the week, giving me 4 extra little girls, ages 4, 4, 2, and 1. I can't wait! My kids are very excited for "Cousin Camp" and are planning activities and things. We are also trying hard to clean up our house and "toddler-proof" is again, at least sort of. It has been a while since we had a toddler in the house, and we are trying to "purge" and go back to living in a "simple" house. That has left a ginormous pile of stuff for our garage sale right in front of our door. Today we got most of it picked up and taken up to Josiah's room. We have made quite a bit of progress toward the garage sale, but still have a long way to go.

Some of the things we need to prepare for "Cousin Camp". Menu that is easy, the kids will like, and we can stick too. Then need to get grocery shopping done on Sunday. Recipes....edible playdough, fun snacks, that kind of thing. Our character quality for the week is "gratefulness", so we are going to include the little ones and are printing our coloring pages, and making a porcupine out of pipe cleaners. We hope to run through the sprinkler, watch the newest VeggieTales movie, and read some books too. We also want to make concrete garden stepping stones, so we need to get those materials in the next few days also. I really wish we had a 15 passenger van, so we could go to the park, but alas...not yet.

To make us even busier! The Danskin Triathlon is the weekend. Tomorrow I will be taking my bike up to Seattle, and picking up my race number and such. The family has not been to the traithlon in a few years....rain, sickness, laziness on my part. But they are coming this year, and I am looking forward to that. Noelle did not want to go though, she doesn't remember it at all, and thought she would have to DO the triathlon. Poor girl. She was fine with it once I told her she could just watch. Though this really hinders my preparation time for next week, I am glad to have a little "me" time this weekend. I really enjoy the triathlon, and hope to really run this year. I have never really run well in the triathlon, but having finished two half marathons now...well, I'm hopeful.

Better get to work!

What to do??

So many options! And so little time!

It is Wednesday, the middle of spring break. The first half was consumed with Randy's parents either coming (must clean house!) or spending time with them. We enjoyed this trip probably more than we have ever enjoyed them before. The kids absolutely loved them. They got spoiled, but were very gracious and behaved beautifully the whole time. I was very proud. It was a fun spring break.

But now we are alone. Today and tomorrow we have nothing planned. Our house is clean, the laundry is mostly done, and we can just be together. How can I make this special and not waste this time just doing the usual? If we are not careful, this chance will be gone, with nothing to show for it.

I believe we will play lots of games, have good food, and watch some movies. I kind of hope to sneak in a date with my husband also. But we will see.

I delight in my family. I am proud of them, I enjoy spending time with them. I love the people they are becoming. I love the way they love each other (most of the time). We are a team. We work best together.

We did get some things done with around here despite our company. We got the garden going, weeded, added compost, and planted a lot of broccoli, spinach, lettuce and some peas. And today it is raining, so everything will be well watered.

We also got Rayana riding a bike, and that is quite an accomplishment. For the last two years (since I removed her training wheels) she has refused to get on her bike. And had since outgrown it, and really had nothing to ride. Her grandparents bought her a new bigger one, and she learned to ride it yesterday. Stopping and turning are still issues, but that will come. She is very excited, as am I, about all the possibilities that are open to us. She can't wait to ride to the pumpkin patch in the fall.

Ok, off to make a grocery list and get that done so that we can just be together.

Visit from family

My in-laws are here to visit for a few days. They live in northern California. It is very interesting to me to see my husband interact with them. There are many things that are explained when they are together...so many ways that they are alike. It is fun to see where he gets some of his mannerisms. I understand him better because of this.

It is alsy great to see the kids with their grandparents. We are so blessed to have my mom so close and so active in the kids lives. They know and love her like a third parent. But it is also nice to see them spoiled by other grandparents. They discuss and plan who gets to sit by them and are completely enjoying having them here.

It has also been interesting because we have not eaten at home in almost 48 hours. This is pretty strange for me. I enjoy cooking, I would love to be hospitable to my in-laws, but they insist on going out to eat, and taking us with them. On one hand, I hate to think of all the garbage that my kids have in their systems right now. They love to go to restaurants, so they are having the time of their lives. But I worry about all the unhealthyness of it all. On the other hand, I haven't had to do any dishes in the last two days. No cooking, no cleaning, just enjoying my kids...I love that! It is a spring break for me!

Today we will be going to Walmart to get the kids something. It should be interesting and fun.

I plan on looking at some seed while we are there. The garden is almost ready for planting, and I really need to get some things going. Mainly broccoli and spinach, and maybe some lettuce. I hope to produce a lot more of our food this year. Each year will be a learning experience.

Pain in change

The kids are asleep. But I can't get any. I couldn't fall asleep last night, and I woke up a couple of hours ago, and can't go back to sleep. I am not shocked, just frustrated.

Today I start a week long course on Grantmanship. 4US is paying for me to go so that I can learn to write grants and hopefully help to raise funds to grow 4US into a national organization. I am very excited for the opportunity. I would love to be able to help 4US in a much bigger way than I have, and I know that they skills that I learn could be very useful in many other aspects. I have hopes that it might be helpful in adoption also...if we can ever get there.

My struggle with this come in two ways though, the first the biggest. My family is, and always has been my first priority, and my purpose. It was a very tough decision to leave them for a week to take this class. Mom has them today, then Noelle is going to stay with Beth for 4 days. My heart aches thinking of her sleeping somewhere else for so long. I know that she is in very, very good hands, but I love her so much and want the to be the one to scratch her itchy back.

In addition to my struggles with leaving them to fend for themselves, I had no doubt that they would be sick or something. Sure enough, Rayana has had a fever for the last 3 days, and Noelle felt very warm to me in the night. Josiah says that he doesn't feel well, though he does not seem to have the fever yet. They only thing I hate worse than not being there for my kids, is not being there for them when they are sick. It pains me to leave them.

Second, I feel very inadequate. While I know that I am pretty intelligent, I have a very limited knowledge of business, and have been a stay at home mom for the last 10+ years. I can bake a mean loaf of bread, but can I keep up in a classroom with these people? I have always struggled with confidence, and have not been in a classroom since losing weight. Will it make a difference, or will I still feel like I don't belong. I hate that feeling, it just makes me want to run home to my kids, and to where I am comfortable.

God is definitely stretching me this week. I am moving out of my comfort zone in many ways. I am leaving my family in the care of others, letting God be sufficient for them. I am exploring areas in which I am not very knowledgeable, and may feel dumb...(which I am not very used to). And I will need to work through my weaknesses and practice loving those that I just met. I hope also that I will be articulate and compassionate with the people in this class. My greatest desire would be that I would not only learn the skills that are needed to help raise funds, but that those in this class would come to view our mission, both at 4US and as Christians, in a new way.

JOY - Jesus first, others second, yourself last....I have to keep that in mind this week. This class is for Jesus and for others, my insecurities will have to be faced head on so that God can be given the glory this week.

Time for my alarm to go off, I better get started...

Ministry

I have been thinking a lot about your purpose as a family. I know a big part of our purpose is to raise our kids to know and love God with all their hearts and to be "in the world and not of the world". That is our formost goal and passion. We also want to impact the larger world for the glory of God. We care specifically and focus our attention on Haiti, as God has given us all a passion for that small country.

But these days, especially as it is baseball season, and Randy is in his own classroom, I have been thinking about our purpose in our local community. We have struggled a long time to get the point where we are right now, with me at home with the kids, and Randy, a teacher. And much of the time we lost focus on the reason for that. We wanted the stability of a regular paycheck, the schedule that allows for great family times, and to be involved with youth, as Randy is so gifted in this area. Teaching was a very natural fit. However, in the last few months, I have seen so plainly how teaching history is simply a means to an end, not the end in itself. It is the cover for getting Randy in the schools and allowing him to impact students with the love of God, when so many of them need it the most. The things that are dealt with in the school he teaches in is incredible. In the last month, an abortion and the death of a newborn, have been things that Randy has brought home to us. He is not only a teacher, but a friend, and advisor, and a confidante to these kids. And with more time, I see us all, as a family, becoming more and more involved in this ministry. With baseball season here, we are meeting some of these kids, and they are getting to know us. If our desire is to show them love, we (especially me) need to focus and plan for that end.

What that looks like in the future, I don't know. Maybe it means more kids staying with us, maybe more dinners, more phone calls...I don't know. But I want to be open to whatever God has for us. I want to be prepared to offer our family as a place of acceptance, love and truth, as a place of refuge from the world, not only for my own kids, but for any who need it. My home is not ready for that right now. I have a lot a work to do, and I am behind. I pray that God will give me the discipline to be ready for those occasions, so that I can be Mary, not Martha....

Concert with the kids

Last night I took the kids to Seattle to go see the Rock and Worship Roadshow. It was a concert with Mercy Me, Jeremy Camp, Hawk Nelson, Tenth Avenue North and Addison Road. I had not been to a concert since I was pregnant with Josiah, and the kids had never been to a concert. It was quite an ordeal, as the kids usually go to bed at 7:30-8 but the concert didn't start until 7. We knew it would be a late night, but I didn't realize how much the kids would be affected. We didn't get home until about 11:30. Thankfully, the kids slept on the way home.

Noelle fell asleep on the way to the concert, no problem. Until we were a few blocks from the concert and I realized that she had had an accident in there sleep. I don't bring changes of clothes for them anymore...though maybe I should. Be had brought pajamas to change into after the concert, so the kids could go to sleep on the way home though. But Noelle's were too cold, and rather loud, so she put her sister's pajama pants on and off we went.

The concert was great. It was fun to watch the kids dancing, yelling and really enjoying themselves. Rayana got tired very early, and just couldn't stay awake for at least half the concert. It seemed a bit unusual, because usually, she is the party animal and can stay awake for days. Then when I got her up this morning, I realized she was sick and had a fever! The poor girl...sleeping through a concert!

Noelle was very good, I had fun sitting by her, and loving on her while she daydreamed and watched the lights. Josiah looked bored out of his mind. He was also extremely tired and started to nod off a few times. But when Mercy Me played "Imagine", he was wide awake and singing along. On the way back to the car, he kept talking about how great the whole thing was and how much he loved it. I guess his expression is not necessarily an indication of what is going on in his head.

The best part for me, was watching my kids practice what we have been trying to teach them. Before we walked in, I overheard Josiah telling his sisters that is would be very crowded and they needed to listen to me, stay close, and hold his hand so they wouldn't get lost. So they did. They obeyed perfectly, held each other hands (even though it has to be very uncool when you are 10 to hold your sister's hand), and cooperated fully. They were considerate of the people sitting around us and thoroughly enjoyed themselves and the concert. I was full of joy!

The concert was impressive. I have kind of avoided concerts, in part because of the cost, and in part because of the cost (out of our pocket!). This was different. We would not have gone if it was more than $10. In fact, all night I was waiting for the catch....like we would have to pay another $20 each or stay and pick up every bit of trash before we could leave. Instead, the artists asked that the money go the a few charity causes that were at the event. I believe God was honored by that philosophy. The focus was on worshipping God and using what he has blessed us with to bless others. It was right. I was excited to be a part of it.

Worshipping with your kids has got to be the best thing in the world. And to see their excitement over a new CD is great. I know they have the best in that CD. Good intentions, great words and a heart for God that is demonstrated over and over. I love that this CD will take us back to that place, and to those memories.

Bigger Family

These last few days we have been fortunate to have my beautiful nieces Mia (3 1/2) and Zoe (1 1/2) stay with us while my sister Beth and her husband got some time away to celebrate their anniversary. I learned some things from our time as a family of 7.

1. I loved it. I love having a car full of kids everywhere we go. I love the dynamics of a larger family. There were many hands to pitch in a get things cleaned up, lots of entertainment for the little ones, lots of laughs, and a few more messes too. I really enjoyed having more kids around.

2. My sister is a very good mother. Mia and Zoe are sweethearts and very good kids. It is obvious that they are well cared for, not only physically, but emotionally and spiritually as well. They are polite, obedient and just fun to be with.

3. 5 kids, especially 3 of them 4 years old and under, take a lot more organization and planning then I tend to have on a daily basis. We did great, but the time that they were here was pretty well planned. There was not a lot of room for spontinaity. That is fine, but it is certainly not my strongest area and something I need to work on if we are to add to our family.

4. I love my own kids SO much! It was such a joy to watch them with their younger cousins. I could not have managed without them. They were helpful, caring and tender. They picked up the slack when I needed them to, and did everything asked of them with a joyful heart. I was especially impressed with Noelle, as I had worried how she would feel about first, not being the baby, and having to do more to take care of herself, and second, sharing everything she owns, with out holding anything back, with her cousins. She was terrific! She loves them, and so what was her's was theirs. It was a privilege to watch. We are definitely doing a few things well as parents.

5. I need to be more consistent. I guess that probably goes with #3, but it is in a different arena. I need to be consistent in making sure that the kids clean up after dinner, in making them put their dirty laundry away, instead of on the floor, and in making sure that their chores get finished well. Consistency would make this household run much smoother, with fewer issues.

I loved having Mia and Zoe, but I am also enjoying my time with just my kids now that they are gone. While we waited for the bus this morning, I couldn't help smiling at them. I love them and am so proud of them! I look forward to spending the day with my Noelley, just the two of us. And can't wait to see the older two as they get off the bus. (I might just pick them up from school, so I can see them sooner!)

God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve!

Mamma Mia

I watched the musical Mamma Mia last night. I am usually not a musical kind of girl, though I love the songs, I kind of prefer that they get to the point. But I was in the mood for one...

One song had me in tears....Slipping through my fingers. I had never heard it, though I am sure that everyone else has. I have two little girls, whom I dearly love. They are young enough that I feel like I do know them, but it seems easy to be adored by my girls while they are young, but I wonder if things will change as they grow up. Will they get tired of me, resent me, or can I still be there hero. Rayana will be going back to school on Monday, and I will cry, I miss them so much when they are at school. I pray that I will not miss one important moment...the ones that are important to Rayana, not just to me. My time with them is so fleeting, and there is so much that I want to share with them. How do I teach them everything I want to, while still doing laundry and making dinner. I think I have discovered a little bit of that through this book, Managers of their Chores. I loved it, and it really opened my eyes to ways that I had been failing my kids, but I have made changes already, and they have been very receptive, even enjoying their new chores. In addition, they are learning how to be managers of their homes, and I am spending more time with them, as they do the things that I usually do with me.

Thank you God for the wisdom written in that book, and for the blessing of a song in a musical that reminds me how precious my children are and how they are truly my most important job.

The players in my life...

I am a stay at home mother of three wonderful kids. I also do a little bit of substitute teaching in my kids schools. I have also been involved for the last year in a terrific charity called 4US. I do some bookkeeping/recordkeeping. 4US hosts a bike/run/walk/motorcycle event once a year that helps raise money to buy ultrasound machines for our local crisis pregnancy centers.
My kids are both home schooled and attend public school. I say that because I believe that their education is completely my responsibility. School is a place that we use to both to help educate our children and as a place for them to practice walking like Jesus in the real world. It is important for me to be at home with them so that I can guide them to becoming the men and women that God wants them to be.

Josiah is almost 10. He has started a new school this year in a special class for highly gifted children. It has been very good for him, as not only is he learning much more, but he is being pushed to work much harder, become more organized and to take more responsibility for himself. In addition, Josiah loves all things football and baseball. Other sports are acceptable, but these are his two loves. He reads a lot, loves Christian rap (especially DC Talk) and incredible memory. He is especially kind-hearted, so can easily get taken advantage of by his sisters.

Rayana is 7 and has just learned to read in the first grade. She now reads everything she can get her hands on. She loves to draw and sing and create things. She wants to be a singer and a mom when she grows up. She loves school, misses her friends when she is not there, and loves to learn. She is also the most dramatic one, though she is very capable of turning it on and off quickly. It is usually either the best, or the worst, day of her life.

Noelle is 4 tells everyone she is homeschooled, which is completely accurate. She goes everywhere and does everything with me, and learns lots along the way. She knows how to play the youngest card, making a list of the things she is not capable of because she is the baby, such as folding her pajamas to put away. We are working on that. She is much more shy that they others, though very smart and very creative. She can write all her letters and her favorite thing to do is to write stories, asking me how to spell all the words she needs.

My husband is a teacher. He is loyal, generous, kind, and devoted. He loves sports also, and is highly involved in sports at the high school. He has verious jobs during each sporting season, and currently supervises all home basketball games. Josiah often goes with him, and the girls and I attend a few games as well. Randy has a very bad back, with affects most aspects of our lives. He is very supportive of all my crazy ideas and is my biggest fan, which I love. He is a great husband.

New Years Resolutions

Along with my long list from last year, much of which I accomplished, one of my New Years Resolutions for 2009 is to begin journalling. I know it can be important. God knows how much time I have spent reading other people's lives, but I have been inconsistent in doing it for myself. However, I want to do two things with this blog. First, capture my thoughts and processes even slightly, so that I can see who I am from the outside looking in. I hope to see progress toward my goal of becoming more like Christ. Second, I hope my kids will read this someday and recognize the struggles that are involved in motherhood, marriage, and being a Christian. I hope to find balance through this journey.

That said....it is a new year and I am not prepared for the next week, let along the next year. I have a list in my head, but I will promptly forget everything in it if I find something more interesting. I am what some have called a "Side-tracked Home Executive". I have good intentions, but am easiely distracted by all the other things that need to be done. For example, today, the kids and I need to do some weekly chores, vacuuming, dusting, mopping, laundry...but what am I doing instead? Sat down to check my email while they at some breakfast, and here I am starting a blog!

Alright, my list...weekly chores, get recycling to recycling center, clean up sewing machine ( I just sewed for the first time in years - made the cutest skirts for my girls - very twirly - big smiles!), finish my New Year's Resolutions, practice memorizing with Josiah, finish menu planning for next two weeks. If I get this all done today, I will feel like Superwoman!